Another Step, Another Discovery

My ways are mine
Your ways are yours
Leave me to lead myself
All your advice all your ideas
Reside in the definition of hollow
I feel empty enough
It’s funny how the one who
Has the right
Who should be guiding
Has always just left it.
Kinda backwards
He should have been
He should be
Instilling ideas instigating action
A different approach he practices

Suddenly it’s clear
By leaving me to my own devices
I have shaped myself
Taken elements taken qualities
from the people I’ve met
from the experiences
I have a lot of self-pride
Which is a result of
Creation of any sort
I sit smiling with this
Newly discovered truth
Maybe I had to hate him
To truly learn to love him
Another year gone
Another sense of growing up
It’s strange to look back
At what I believed to be true
So long ago
and realize I had it all reverse

Tonight I have this sense
That I’ve taken another step
I’ve made another stride
on this trail
Well no, I’m not walking a path
I am paving my own road
This pencil is my machete
and this page is the under-brush
Slowly meticulously hacking through the nonsense
Blazing through this forest of life

To all of you today may seem
Uneventful or wasted
but if you asked and I saw
Actual interest displayed in your face
I wouldn’t have an issue
Letting you know the truth

Tonight I feel this
Tonight through your disregard
Another cloud has evaporated
Another slice of blue sky
has peeked through
Tonight inside my head it will not rain
Tonight a beam of sunlight
has washed over me
My cloudy head is less so
I plan to relish in it
The forecast detailed thunderstorms
There has been a lovely change
Tonight I shall celebrate myself
In my own way.


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