My Enveloping Reflection – Epilogue

Last month I released my first collection of poetry, My Enveloping Reflection.  If you haven’t checked it out yet, I encourage you to do so.  I am proud of what I have put together, though I’m not so pleased with how long it took me to get it out on the mean streets of the internet.  But I can say that I am not sure that I could have finished it sooner than I did.

I don’t want to spend too much time talking about it and I don’t want to explain it all.  It’s better if I don’t hold your hand and analyze it all for you.  Though I do hope most understand what MER is about.  With that being said, I will say that within those 10 poems I have shared quite a bit of my life with the world.  MER covers events and feelings from high school all the way to this past March/April.  About 8 years of my life shaved down and encased in a small collection of poetry, in an attempt to escape the echoes of the past.  I’m sure it’s clear to most that there’s a focus on substance abuse but it’s not meant as a condemnation of said substances.  For me I had to shed that skin completely.  If I could sit and have a beer or two that would be nice but I can’t.  Two becomes twenty in no time and alcohol, as well as other drugs, corrupts my mind.  I have a severely addictive personality and a lot of times it comes in waves.  Take music for example, I can and often do listen to one artist exclusively for an entire week and the next week I am listening to something else and that previous artist won’t be heard again for months.  I’m losing sight of what I am writing… I could ramble on and on and take you down a wacky road only to lose you before we reach the destination I am trying to get to.

So I said that MER covers events up to April or so, right?  In other terms, it covers what led to the decision to quit drinking and the immediate aftermath.  Actually, it’s probably more like the beginning of March.  I am stuck with the idea of April because that is when I wrote “Admission into the Haze” which is a poem that is an artistic look at, for the lack of a better term, falling in love with drug abuse.

What I am saying is there is more to say and I have known that for quite some time, though the idea of a follow up has gone through different iterations over the past 6 months or so.  At this time I have a clear vision of what sort of direction to go with it.  Right now I am approaching 10 months of sobriety and it has not been easy.  There are some things I won’t share about the experience because not everything has poetic potential.   Quite a few people have told me that they appreciated how honest MER is and that kind of strikes me in a strange way because I made it a point to curtail my honesty.  I have written quite a few poems that can be called “brutally honest” and I can apply that term to some of the poems I have earmarked for the follow up but MER is more of an artistic kind of honesty.

Before I go, I’d like to apologize to anyone that has been waiting for some noise from me.  I promise that I am working on things for your reading enjoyment; your patience will not be spent in vain.  I will talk about what’s next very soon.

For now I will leave you with one little thought; there is structure in panic.

Thanks for reading!

-Ed

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